It amazes me how people so easily and so quickly misrepresent something.

I few special people received pre released copies of Stephen Hawking’s new book THE GRAND DESIGN sparking all these news feeds yesterday on a truly interesting topic.  The existence of God and the Big Bang Theory.  These news articles chose to reveal a pretty limited context in any of the reviews or commentary. They all contain pretty much the same quotes from the text.

They are:

“It is not necessary to invoke God to light the blue touch paper and set the Universe going.”

“Because there is a law such as gravity, the Universe can and will create itself from nothing.”

“Spontaneous creation is the reason there is something rather than nothing, why the Universe exists, why we exist.”

Those quotes do say a lot. But many people are focusing on exactly what they aren’t saying.

The live feed from trending topics on twitter show things like this:

@EricStangel Stephen Hawking says there is no God. I guess that A-Hole has never eaten at the Cheesecake Factory

@cmabe55 Stephen Hawking is a twit: God didn’t fire up the Big Bang? How’s Steve know? Was he there? Does he have the video?

@Steffan1 Yesterday, Stephen Hawking stated without a doubt God did not create the universe.

@gregory_goose Stephen Hawking finally says something that makes sense! There is no God.

Even the headline on the CNN.com article is:

“Stephen Hawking: God didn’t create universe”

In principle you can’t prove a negative.  I’m sure Stephen Hawking knows this.  You can know it too if you just try it out.  Now, Compare what the public is representing the quote as, to what the literal quote states.  No where in the published quotes does he say “there is no god” or “god didn’t cause the big bang” or anything like it.  Yet within those who both agree and disagree with his statements. There is a common theme; misrepresenting it to state the absolute negative.  Stephen Hawking is simply providing an alternative theory.  A theory that seems to not require God’s role. The theory is quite extraordinary, and any extraordinary claim requires extraordinary evidence.  So I also implore people to wait for the full published text before assigning themselves or condemning others.

We need to get out of that habit.  Especially if you want to make any educated statements, assumptions or plausible claims.   It is far easier to prove that something is. Than that something is not.

This a problem.  Not many scientist are actually out to prove there is no God.  They know they can’t.  The onus is on those who claim something is.  To prove that it is.  Because anyone who claims something could not.  Already has a flawed claim.  Evidence supporting a theory that it is ‘not necessary to invoke God’.  is far from saying ‘God did not’.

Peace!
-Keegan
September 2010

I think it’s ironic that shortly after the State of AZ threatens to sue the Federal Government; claiming health care reform is unconstitutional.  The Obama administration has been given the opportunity to do the same to the Arizona State senate. Immigration bill SB1070 gives Public law enforcement agencies the means to legally demand to see valid paperwork under threat of arrest.

Wholly shit!  Really?

This is the perfect environment to foster racial profiling.  Not to mention this historically familiar stink:

…allowing the local police to enforce federal immigration laws, is a step in the right direction—if you want to emulate the Third Reich or if you want to return to the days of second class citizenship in the United States. The first thing a fascist government will do is demand that you justify your very existence, as in “Let me see your papers.” Does this person look Jewish (whatever that means)? Stop him/her!  Now substitute, does this person look Latino (whatever that means)? Stop him/her! -Maria Padilla

To be fair, the federal government has kept the issue at arms length.  And this type of action from the state might be a sort the childish ‘calling out for attention’ that gets a response.  Problem is, there are at least a million and a half legal citizens of mexican descent living here too.  And you can’t just mess with their lives like this.  Restrict access and their movement?  Unconstitutional. Period.

As for the Arizona/Mexico border itself.  The border has been publicized with the image of a war-zone.  Full of violent mexicans flooding into america.  Thieving and murdering as they go.  This is just not the case.  Crime statistics for areas in the US are cataloged. You can look them up. And border towns like Douglas Arizona have crime rates far below the national average.  http://www.cityrating.com/citycrime.asp?city=Douglas&state=AZ

Meanwhile little old Camden NJ, is rocking out on both violent and property crime. http://www.cityrating.com/citycrime.asp?city=Camden&state=NJ

The border is not a war-zone of crime.  The majority of undocumented immigrants coming across the border are not trying to hurt anyone.  They are poor people crossing the desert.

The system we have here is not set up to support poor people coming across into the US and everyones answer is that we need to stop them from coming across.  This firstly, is just not working.   The stated objective in border policy and immigration isn’t being accomplished, yet continues to be enforced. The publicity surrounding the issue claims that this is happening in waves. The press rarely asks if in fact the stated objectives (freedom, safety, law&order) are in fact different from the actual overriding objectives.  Though the numbers seem to dissagree. I think this all implies that they are succeeding at an unstated objective.  The actual accomplished objective is to generate fear, hatred and to segregate americans from each other and non-americans.

Secondly, the answer isn’t stricter immigration Laws. Or cracking down on immigration by the Federal Government OR the State of Arizona.  That disgusts me. Our similarities as humans heavily outweigh or differences across all borders and cultures. And maybe more people need to consider that it’s the system that is flawed. Not the Hispanic people.

-Keegan Orange -2010

*EDIT* 4/28/10

If the problem is illegal immigration. And trying to solve the problem by keeping immigrants out is not working. We need to change the system to one where we benefit from having immigrants here. Documented or otherwise. (this is how America got its start, and it was extremely prosperous for everyone). I learned a long time ago that you shouldn’t try the same thing over and over again and expect different results. Change is difficult, and I know no one ever wants to change themselves. It’s always easier outward, me vs them, and they must be the ones to change. But in the end, that really only makes the problem worse.  And now In the case of Arizona. We are on the verge of a huge race issue with a million people stuck in the middle. Real people, with lives and families and all that hippy la la stuff. We’re all the same. Try and treat each other as such.

I helped compose this article with my mother who lives in Southeastern Arizona.  She is passionate about her home and community there.  I hope you’ll consider her opinion and know that she hopes for nothing but respect towards the Krentz family’s loss. But it is important for readers across the nation to see what effect media publicity has on the area.  -Keegan Orange

My sincere condolences to the Family of  Robert Krentz. On Saturday March 27th Chochise county rancher Robert Krentz and his dog were fatally shot on his land in Southeastern Arizona near Douglas. Big news for a town with a crime rate far below the national average per capita. This is sad news and brings fear to our hearts and much publicity worthy of such a prominent person in the ranching community.

It is being said in many news articles and blogs that this was illegal immigrant(s). It is my understanding that the murder suspect was tracked back to Mexico.  The evidence supports that it was someone from Mexico headed back to Mexico, but I do not see how it was an immigrant. The definition of an immigrant is a person who comes to a country where they were not born in order to settle there. An illegal immigrant would be the same, though uninvited. That being said it does not follow that an immigrant would be tracked back to his own country. It would seem to me this is a case concerning a bandit, or a drug trafficker. This was a terrible crime.

Our news reporters and some politicians are reporting this event as a need to call for Federal Troops and more Homeland Security because this is evidence of illegal immigration problems. See this article on Fox news. http://www.foxnews.com/us/2010/03/31/reward-offered-arrest-arizona-ranchers-killing/.

What the first step the Fox news article does is talk about immigrants right next to the idea of a lone thief or drug smuggling bandit. Repeat it enough times and the reader stops seeing the difference between the two. The second step is to remind its readers that Governor Jan Brewer uses crime near the border as a case for the border issue; petitioning the federal government for support with military enforcement.  Altering the rest of the country’s perception of what an illegal immigrant is makes it easier to gain support for a political agenda.

On a local community and business level we feel the pressure on our economy, our civic development as well as the close relationship we have with our neighbors in Mexico.  Yes there are illegal immigrants who cross the border and most look for work and a better life. There are also criminals, or those who might be referred to as bandits or drug smugglers. These people are dangerous but I do not see floods of them coming across our border. They are not the immigrants who are being caught in the desert in groups often with family members and backpacks with new clothes that their mothers packed for them to help them in their new life.

Ranching in Southern Arizona has been related to Mexico for hundreds of years. At one time Mexican people often worked ranches on either side of the border.  Ranchers are some of the least prejudiced peoples here. Yes they want to protect themselves and yes there is crime, but do not call this case an onslaught of illegal immigrants.

There are 17,000 people in the city of Douglas and about that many in the unincorporated area of Cochise County. We have families and friends who live in Mexico. We go to the grocery store and attend community functions.  I personally love going to the grocery store and always seeing someone I know. This gives me a sense of safety and comfort here. Other business owners who have their offices near mine are worried as I am, that the country sees our community as a purely dangerous, or more pointedly, we are not considered at all. My country, the one I live in is here also. We do not enjoy having our name debased and trashed and having our constitutional rights taken away because we live ‘on the border’. And our crime rate is not disproportionate to our country. http://www.cityrating.com/citycrime.asp?city=Douglas&state=AZ that is a link to Douglas Crime, Here is one for another Los Angeles http://www.cityrating.com/citycrime.asp?city=Los+Angeles&state=CA How does yours rate?  Do you have check points scattered throughout your highways?

It is not the border patrol agents’ fault.  Conduct around the border is administrated by Homeland Security leaders, who follow the wave of political movements. The border issue with Mexico is a rising post-healthcare-reform debate. Again, it is terrible to see the death of a man in our community used to infect political opinion and transmit misinformation to the rest of the country.

There exists here on the border a community of people that have lived near and who’s families have been intertwined for generations. Those of us living on the border with Mexico call this place home. We are a community, not a war zone. Every community has crime, some more than others. Ours has become an area where the politicians have taken advantage of crime and used it for their federal political platform. Is anyone asking the national guard to take up stance in South Central, LA?

I am not opposed to having border enforcement. I do not know how to “be” border enforcement but it seems sensible to me that if we want to stop dangerous people from coming across the border we should have the patrols actually on the border, not 50 miles north. Maybe I should not even mention a solution for a job I do not know how to do. I would like to know why there are security checkpoints with a dozen border patrol vehicles and as many agents mulling about, no where near the actual border and then ask the federal government to send military aid also to the area? At this point maybe alternative suggestions just might be OK.

In conclusion I’d like to again express my condolences to the Krentz family. I will also continue to enjoy the community that I live in and continue to share it with others. I in turn would like you who have never been here and have only heard of us because we live on your border to realize that we are a living breathing community. Please treat us as such.

Peace
-PJF

compressed space time (click for larger)

For a while I have had a problem with this image. And as images like this come, this one is pretty good.  It has some description. It even goes into how light travels in the shortest possible path through space.  Which could be better described as the shortest path of least resistance through space.   To those of you that are like me, you might quickly draw a question from this image.  Why is space a flat plane? Is not space composed of three planar dimensions? That is my problem with physics analogies.  Words often fail to compensate for the lack of appropriate human perspective.  The analogy is appropriate if you are informed about a few of its convolutions.

This image is the rubber sheet illustration it goes like this:

If you took a stretchy sheet of rubber and rolled a bowling ball onto it, the sheet would bow and stretch and no longer be flat depending on the location of the bowling ball.  the “Weight” of the bowling ball creates a depression.  If you put any other object onto the sheet it would roll towards the bowling ball as if they were attracted to one another.  In this example the bowling ball and the other object are matter, the rubber sheet is “space-time.”

Notice two things from this description. “Weight” and “space-time.” In reality, the presence of the bowling ball causes space-time to bend.  This whole analogy/illustration performed in a perceptibly weightless environment would fail. The bowling ball would have no effect on the rubber sheet.  The example uses Gravity to describe Gravity.  A glaring flaw.  It is important to think of this weight instead as “acceleration.” Even in a weightless environment, a rubber sheet accelerating for example, at -9.8m/s^2 (the acceleration of gravity on earth) against a bowling ball will appear just as the same example performed on the surface of the earth does.

The next confusing bit is the image of a flat sheet representing space.  It is easy to get caught up on a 2d space.  Our solar system for the most part even appears mostly 2 dimensional.  The planets orbiting around the sun’s equatorial plane.  In a big giant disc.  The orbiting paths of the solar bodies, or even celestial bodies in the galaxy are easily represented on a flat map. We walk around on what appears to be a flat surface to the earth. But the reality is that space extends and curves in all directions proportionally.  The 2d map, and the word “space-time” go hand in hand.  We are used to thinking of things in three dimensions. We even have some pretty good practice at perceiving time as the forth dimension.  But it is a rare person that can properly perceive a sub dimension of time, that is the acceleration of space through time.

To make this easily perceived, we compress a spacial dimension.  Some illustrations of this compress all of space down to a 1 dimensional line.  And the acceleration of space through time is the second dimension. We call this “space-time.” Get it?

Now in this illustration, there is plenty of room in our human perception to imagine space moving with direction. In this case, it moves upwards at the speed of light.  The depressions along the line represents space that has decelerated from the rest of matterless space.

This is where theories start to differ.  One theory that I really like is to imagine all of space time and matter consisting of strings.  Sometimes these strings vibrate, sometimes they do not.  Non-vibrating strings move at the speed of light and exist only as the dimensions of space through time.  It takes energy to move at the speed of light.  But it also takes energy to vibrate.  Vibrating strings in the form, say, form of a proton.  Waste all their energy becoming matter and drop down out of light speed.  In the end of it all, the combination of interacting light-speed strings and sub-light strings bend and distort the fabric of space into what we perceive as a negative acceleration between matter.

I believe this to mean, that the relative motion of the Earth’s matter, and the space around it is a gravitational difference in acceleration of 9.8 meters per second per second.

I particularly am tickled by the reductionism of everything. Energy related to matter, related to light speed. Defining time, space, mass, gravity.  All of which effect each other in such a symbiotic balance that allow me to enjoy it.

–Keegan, 2010

The following are all things I’ve heard about companies or research universities developing.  Essentially future technology that has money going towards it right now.

Nanotechnology uses the controlled structure of matter on an atomic or molecular scale. I think if developed and cheap enough to manufacture, this would be the next biggest tipping point in our technological history.  Like the renaissance, the industrial revolution or the advent of the integrated circuit. How would you see it? The foremost and most valuable would be medical applications, nanobots traveling through your body, clearing out clogged arteries, scrubbing your black lungs, helping you sleep or even getting you high. Nano-blood that works a hundred times more efficiently, maybe taking a single breath and holding it under water for 4 hours. As it develops into other marketable aspects, imagine nano-paint in your home, that you could dial to any color. A general utility fog; objects that conjure themselves out of thin air occupied by a microscopic nanofog, that when commanded come together to provide you with pants.  timeframe: 20 years

Blanket Internet/Electricity Imagine no wires, no plugging things in, no charging of batteries. Not worrying about bandwidth or lack of bars. The first round of questions on this topic go like this: 1) Is it safe? Yes, Thank you young Dustin Hoffman! 2)Can you make it small? The technology is already small enough to fit in cell phones 3)Why don’t we have it yet? Well, who will pay for this?  That’s the biggest problem. The technology exists now, but infrastructure on the other hand is essentially nonexistent. Until then, we won’t see it. timeframe: less than 10 years

Real Time Universal Communication forget long distance, forget regions. A device that lets me see and talk to anyone, anywhere, anytime, in any language. All from the price of the hand held device. No carriers. No minutes. No bullshit. Technology nearly available with addition of (See:Blanket internet.) Almost there on the translation technology too. Just need to clear with the FCC and keep companies like AT&T from shutting it down. For it would certainly be their doom.  timeframe: less than 5 years

Augmented Reality is one of those that I can see becoming integrated with life-per-usual quickly and easily because of how much money can be made from it. Think advertising dollars and opt-in/opt-out campaigns. In a sense, we already have some forms of augmented reality.  Watching sports events live on TV is an obvious example.  The scores, player information, all sorts of data and additions to the game are displayed on your screen, usually right on top of the field of play.  I’m not really balls deep for sports though, so what I am talking about is I guess is called ADVANCED augmented reality.  Most likely coming in the form of goggles or contact lenses.  Where you can experience all aspects of your world with many additional streams of relevant information displayed appropriately.  A heads up display or H.U.D. can be used to push you emails, twitters, Facebook updates.  Display your grocery list and sale or nutritional information while you shop for food.  News, wiki or reference information on an indefinite number of visible subject matter.  It could display a clock, or biometric information about yourself like your blood pressure or insulin level. I could imagine it being controlled by eye movements or hand gestures. timeframe: less than 10 years

Planetary Engineering Mars, the moon, or our own fucked up planet once the ice caps melt. The goal in terraforming is to modify the atmosphere, temperature and surface topography of a planet. Using it to generate an ecology similar to that of earth, or that would support human life. I think the need for this will develop on earth first, methods of controlling our weather and correcting any uninhabitable state we might put earth into. timeframe: 80 years

Sex robots; No, really. Imagine celebrities selling off their likeness to make a manufactured robot that you can fuck. “Yes, I’ll take two Tila Tequilas and an Ashton Kutcher… to go.” timeframe: 15 years

I’m am pretty much in support of all of these. So much in fact, it’s kind of sexual. I think I have pretty realistic views of their applications and potential. Nothing will really take off until there is a way to make it profitable. That needs to be the first thing accepted.  You say “Safety?” “Would I let a robot anywhere near my naughty bits?” Probably, it’s probably safer than letting them near any living woman. Beyond the technological development, will be the moral an ethical applications getting in the way of all this crap too.  But I anticipate that those too will be surmounted.  Especially once the youth gets a hold of them.

09/22/09
on a tip from: immortality only 20 years away

The following is a transcript from a less-than-impromptu interview on Twitter.
You can read the background and full story here: Part 1

@FauxSheriffJoe I know your poker buddies await you so I figured we’d get right to the questions if that’s alright with you.
@ohsuplauren My humidor thanks you for making this a no-nonsense thing. Also I think Mecham will eat all the wings if we don’t hurry.

@FauxSheriffJoe Why do you hate Mexicans?
@ohsuplauren:  “Hate” is a strong word. There’s more of them in AZ so statistically they get arrested more.

@FauxSheriffJoe What would your reaction be if the US proposed a combining of countries and changed out name to ‘Ameximerico?’
@ohsuplauren: I will rule over Maricopa County as the last true Democratic stronghold

@FauxSheriffJoe Is there a way to instill fear into the hearts of illegal immigrants without putting it into other legal Latinos/Hispanics?
@ohsuplauren: Crush all Dodge Caravans made before 2001.

@FauxSheriffJoe If you were going to smuggle some ‘Mexicargo’ into the country, how would you do it?
@ohsuplauren: K9 units can’t smell anything frozen inside ice blocks.

@FauxSheriffJoe Realistically, is it possible to locate/apprehend illegal immigrants without racial profiling?
@ohsuplauren: I compare immigration enforcement without profiling to trying to run a marathon without shoes. You won’t move fast enough.

@FauxSheriffJoe You’ve got an interesting history with the Phoenix New Times, care to remark?
@ohsuplauren If @PhoenixNewTimes put half as much effort into journalism as they did getting ads they’d qualify to cover the MCSO.

@FauxSheriffJoe Agreed. I have just a few questions left, if you don’t mind being slightly late to poker night. I hear it’s fashionable.
@ohsuplauren I don’t care what’s fashionable. The night might be shot anyway. J.D. Hayworth can’t fit his cheeks through the door.

@FauxSheriffJoe Do you offer tours of Tent City, or do I need to actually commit a crime to come visit?
@ohsuplauren What would Tent City be without tours? Prepare to be treated like a steak dangled before wolves, however.

@FauxSheriffJoe Is it possible to pick up a decent signal from KJOE in Chandler? I think we may share similar taste in music.
@ohsuplauren: Is it possible to pick up a decent signal from KJOE in Chandler? <> Get a DUI in Chandler, and KJOE will come to you!

@FauxSheriffJoe Have you ever worn/do you currently wear the pink underwear that the Tent City-goers get to wear?
@ohsuplauren: The wife has requested it a few times…

@FauxSheriffJoe What is your favorite Arizona city? (I’m crossing my fingers for Chandler).
@ohsuplauren: Anywhere but “Snottsdale” is fine by me.

@FauxSheriffJoe If life were in black and white, would you say that Mexicans are the ‘grey area?’
@ohsuplauren: I always liked watching Andy Griffith.

@FauxSheriffJoe Has anyone ever told you that you resemble ‘Lovelace,’ the rock hopper penguin from Happy Feet?
@ohsuplauren: I may be girthy but my eyebrows do not look like that.

@FauxSheriffJoe If your supporters and opposers got into a brawl, who do you think would win?
@ohsuplauren: While protesters have silly signs on sticks my supporters appear to enjoy carrying guns. My supporters, as always, would win.

@FauxSheriffJoe Final question, who would win in a theoretical battle to the death, you or Obama?
@ohsuplauren: Age before beauty.

@FauxSheriffJoe Thank you for allowing me the opportunity to interview you. It was a pleasure, so sorry about your poker game.
@ohsuplauren Vote Arpaio 2012 and all will be forgiven, ma’am.

It wasn’t until recently that I started paying closer attention to the media-charade that surrounds Sheriff Joe, (anyone read Phoenix New Times? Yea, me neither). His city of tents, his pink underwear, nothing really struck me as interesting, until I came across twitter celebrity @FauxSheriffJoe, who made it funny.

It’s a rare occurrence to come across someone who understands and can deliver decent satire as frequently and as well as @FauxSheriffJoe does. So, naturally when I was asked to interview him I jumped on the opportunity like Kirstie Alley jumps off a Jenny Craig diet, with motivation and a mouth full of food, (I was on my lunch break).

I decided to take this opportunity to ask @FauxSheriffJoe very specific questions regarding a few recent events in immigration news to make sure he’s on top of his game. One being changes in Federal Immigration laws that will force Arpaio to make critical decisions in how illegal immigrants can be detected/arrested, and the other being a bill concerning the criminalization of illegal immigrants that was recently rejected by the House.

OhSupLauren: Which loss will be more viable, making your Valley sweeps as effective as catch and release fishing, or losing your illegal immigrant detection program for incoming prisoners?

FauxSheriffJoe: I’d rather lose the immigrant detection program. If the ability to sweep is taken away then the MCSO loses a vital portion of its public-relations strategy. The public needs to fear its law enforcement agencies and understand what can happen to them if they cross the line. I don’t know if people think that the MCSO jails are some sort of cartoon world, but green bologna & nutraloaf are real, edible, and consumed on a daily basis. It’s not like there are conga lines and dance classes. There’s real punishment happening in the county jail system.

OSL: Without this program are there other ways to detect an illegal immigrant, aside from the 5 senses?

FSJ: Funny you mention that, because we’ve developed a “sixth sense” program for training our deputies. I hope a young person like you can understand and respect a person who follows the word of God. Every Sunday we try to get as much of the MCSO together at the same church so that we can pray for the ability to keep order and peace while adhering to all legal boundaries. God has not turned the MCSO astray in 17 years and he’s not about to start.

OSL: In stripping the ability or MCSO to arrest an immigrant simply for being here illegally, won’t that only increase the amount of immigrants coming into the country, especially in Arizona?

FSJ: What the illegals don’t know won’t hurt them. I like to think of that old children’s fairy tale about the troll who lived under the bridge and how that troll was the reason no one would cross it. I am that troll to illegals who would dare cross into Arizona. The fear has been placed into them at this point. The silver lining to this economy is that a lot of illegals are going back home on their own volition. This means they’ll take back stories of the MCSO to their families. Word will spread, and all of them will tread more carefully onto US soil.

OSL: If you can only arrest illegal immigrants who have committed other serious crimes, in a roundabout way doesn’t that suggest that simply being here illegally isn’t a crime?

FSJ: It’s unfortunate that the Fed, specifically the current administration, is spending so much time on servicing corporate interests “for the economy” that they’re failing to realize the economic impacts that illegal immigration has on the economy. The MCSO has run some intricate calculations using these crazy computer things and there are some shocking conclusions involved. Your average illegal immigrant destroys wealth by merely existing. The amount they pay in taxes when they buy their Corona Beers or Burrito Cheese things is nowhere near the amount that they steal out of social service systems.

OSL: Can the same logic be applied to other illegal activities? For instance, if I were to drive drunk and get pulled over, could I argue that I hadn’t hit anyone yet, therefore I should not be arrested?

FSJ: You should know that logic and law are good partners. Immigration is (unfortunately) a Federal thing, and DUI is on the state level. If you were pulled over while intoxicated, but could provide the MCSO with a good reliable tip on where we could find illegals, you’d be granted immunity and possibly a cash reward. It’s that simple. Clearly, a person who is intoxicated has contributed to the economy in a positive fashion. An illegal immigrant is a weight, pulling down the value of the dollar. DUI is not the atrocity that it’s made out to be.

OSL: At what point does a law being broken NOT constitute arrest?

FSJ: It depends on several factors (1) How passionate the arresting officer is about his job. (2) God intervening on your behalf. (3) The net worth of your family. I’ve been in this business way too long. Every arrest rests on those three factors.

OSL: The House recently rejected an Immigration Enforcement Bill approved by the Senate that would’ve criminalized the presence of illegal immigrants. Opponents of the bill said it would lead to racial profiling of legal Latino citizens. Are you totally bummed that is wasn’t passed?

FSJ: I am completely distraught at the gross incompetence of this bill. Since when has our country become so illiterate? These people have the word “illegal” in their title. They are “illegal” immigrants. Since when has it ever been legal to just show up to a country and become legal? You’d have to be an awful place to allow such negligence to happen.

OSL: What measures do you take to insure that your Deputies are not using racial profiling to find illegal immigrants?

FSJ: I have my deputies tape a piece of Werther’s Original candy to their dashboards. If a Deputy encounters an individual who is darker than the candy then they have probable cause on their side. Women say it all the time, “Candy doesn’t judge me,” so I figured I’d take my wife’s advice.

OSL: If you had free reign over immigration enforcement, what would you be doing differently?

FSJ: I’d be putting the “illegal” back in illegal immigrants. I’d create legislation that encourages the gathering of day-laborers. I’d provide more funding towards employer sanctions laws. Party stores would no longer be allowed to sell Sombreros. The colors of the Mexican flag will not be allowed to be flown within county limits, and funding would be diverted towards a special jail facility for illegal immigrants. Poor Ava can’t reach for the power locks on the car fast enough when we drive by a Macayo’s. I’d do anything for her.

When it comes to current events, @FauxSheriffJoe is quite obviously knowledgeable, and still able to bring a comedic edge to difficult issues and topics. His clever mix of blatant racism and familiarity with information regarding the real Joe Arpaio allow him to write satirical tweets while maintaining an incredibly genuine character; a character that I personally enjoy and recommend checking out.

Be sure to follow @FauxSheriffJoe and @ohsuplauren on Twitter for the live portion of this interview which will be Tuesday 9/8/9 at 7:30pm Mountain time.

-Lauren Bratcher
09/07/09
www.ohsuplauren.com

“Would you like that as a large for the same price?”

I was a little thrown off and respond without even thinking.  I told the man…

“Yes, that’s fine.”

I get my drink and fasten it between my legs.  It’s kinda big.  I’m intimidated.  I realize I didn’t even want soda to begin with.  I should have just brought water from home.   Yet even knowing this, I couldn’t just say…

“No sir. I do not want this free offer of something more.”

Who does that?

I then thought to myself (and by ‘thought’ I mean ’said’, to myself, alone. I talk to myself.)

“You idiot! You don’t have to drink the whole thing AND this doesn’t even fit in your cup holder. LEGIT reason to say ‘no’ to the large.”

But there I was, I would now have that Lake Michigan sized cup sitting near me for the next several hours at work.  I’m not going to delude myself into thinking I can trick myself  into believing that I have the self control to not drink the whole thing.   That’s ridiculous.  No self respecting person does that.  (Verification: here ‘does that’ means ‘delude themselves’, self respecting people all over the place would absolutely drink that much soda)

I drive the rest of the way, only getting more and more flummoxed.  Why does this sort of thing happen.  Companies pull off the wierdest stunts. To most people it is probably not that big a deal.  But I think the customer/business relationship needs to be a lot more straightforward.  Was there an advertisement somewhere about this large for the price of medium deal?  Did I just get suckered into something?  I spend a lot of time making sure I’m not assuming people are screwing me over constantly.  Why did this event still leave me feeling cheated?  Maybe its the markup on fountain sodas like that, that bothers me in the first place.  I was only being ripped off x190 rather than x200.   Plus all that sugar makes me break-out anyway.

-Keegan
(-who hates ending these things with so many question marks)
08/27/09

It may be that I grew up in a smaller town suburb on the east coast. Rarely were doors ever locked.  On cool summer nights, doors were left propped wide open.  Now I live in a city, and that seems to be absolutely unheard of.

Theft, or personal attack I know is a real thing and a real issue.  I wouldn’t want to be naive and allow myself to be victimized.  But I don’t think locking everything constantly is the answer.  Security is an grand illusion. (as someone who knows a locksmith AND lock pickers) Locks keep people honest, and for most, they give people the illusion of security.  This should be clear to anyone that has had their place broken into or their locked car driven away.

The value of a lock is measured in
-Will it make you feel safe
-How long will it deter an aggressor
Which is more important?  I don’t think it matters.

Did you know lock companies will actually sue locksmiths or lock pickers for informing consumers about the reality of their locks. About how they can be broken, or rating them on their level of security (usually rating them in seconds until lock is disabled)

The point here is, anyone who wants to get beyond a system of “security” (like a bolt on door) bad enough.  Will get in, your feeling of safety is based on the laziness of an aggressor.  The other point here is who wants to live like that?  Who wants to be afraid of their neighbors?  Do you think it’s right that your neighbors are afraid of you?  You don’t deserve it, they probably have no reason to fear you.  You’re a good person, right?

Have you ever visited a friends house, that maybe you’ve never really just walked in the door before, You always knock, they answer?  One time they don’t answer.  You try the handle; it’s unlocked. How many times has this happened and immediately you feel guilty.  You feel like you are doing something wrong.  caught INTRUDING comes to mind.  But your intentions are totally fine, you just came to hang out.  Maybe your friend is in the wash room and its really hot standing there outside.  I think locking doors all the time is what gives good people this immediate feeling that they are doing something wrong.  It’s warped.

Yes, using locks could very well keep some bad person out.  Don’t assume everyone is awesome.  But just be aware of how locking doors might affect your outlook towards your fellow man.

Here’s another really interesting article on this topic at WIRED.com with videos of masters bumping locks, and talking about “security”

The first section of this video next is about a guy locking himself in a cabinet, its not really related, but is interesting. The second half of this video is about the exploration of lock smithing and the psychology of people who have been locked out of their own places.

-Keegan
08/12/09

I’ve been trying to organize more projects and collaborate with different people.  It is hard to get people (even people I know very well already) to stay committed, I don’t have much financial backing.  What are some things I should do ? – Jimmie James

In a lot of the creative fields, especially collaborative ones, you end up building a contact list of people in all different specialties and of varying degrees of competence.  Some of these people will be good friends, and some you will just work with a lot.  Here are some things to keep in mind when interacting with other freelance artists.

The guy who is always working on a million things, never leaves his studio or office and only ever talks about work. HIRE THIS PERSON! I have found again and again, the guy who really has no time to be working on your project is more likely to get it done anyway than the guy who is pretty light on work, and probably even really needs the money.  Even if they are at the same competence level.  There is a reason this first fellah is so busy.  He does whatever is humanly possible to get the job done! People keep coming back to him, he gets referrals, and hell, he probably even enjoys the work he is doing enough that he is okay with cramming four months of work into six days.  (I’m looking at you Adam Benson)

Sometimes your go-to-contacts have now become your friends.  OR, maybe you are just out of school, and you can’t really afford a pro for the job, but you need someone to do it, so you go to one of your peers.  Often times they will be glad to do the job for free.  They need the experience, or another piece for their portfolio. But regardless of these facts, if you give them the job, you will never hear from them about it again.   You try and give them slight reminders, but you feel bad because they are your friends and you wanted it done cheap, and they offered to do it for free.  So you don’t want to push them. Rookie mistake, bro.  You needed to hire that guy like a boss, and pay them at least something, anything!  That way it actually gets done.  If they finish your project, and then turn down your money. Okay that’s fine. They are the glorious exception to the rule.  But don’t count on it.

- From the desk of Dr. Drag
08/07/09

10 reasons why freelancing sucks
10 reasons why freelancing is awesome